Oatmeal Rocks!

AJ had oatmeal for the first time tonight. He LOVED it. Mike couldn't shovel it in fast enough! After he ate he played and scooted around for a while and then fell fast asleep. Here are a few shots of food face. I hope all 3 of my readers enjoy them! :)

White Bread + Rice

Sometimes AJ looks a little like me, and other times he looks like Mike. Who does he look like here?

Then there are times when he looks like a used car saleman.

Major Achievements

My little guy can sit. All by himself. It is a big day.

One Week Down

I finished my first week of work. I can't believe how tired I am. Mike can't believe how tired he is, which gives me a small bit of satisfaction, but don't tell him that...I am glad that the boys were able to spend some time together and get to know each other without me hanging around.
One thing that worries me, however, is that other people have a hard time getting AJ to take naps. I did too, at first, but I devised a plan that works for us. When AJ is tired, he doesn't really have a melt down. He just moans a bit, rubs his eyes and keeps playing. So I learned that when he acts tired, I get his special blanket and his pacifier and we have "Cuddles". He snuggles in there and we rock in his chair and he falls asleep in about 5 minutes or so. After he is good and sleeping, he goes in his crib. (I know other Mothers {maybe my sister Sara?} think I am crazy that I rock him to sleep. But I like to do it.)
Sometimes he stays asleep for hours and other days he stays asleep for a few minutes. This week, he had a few days where he did not sleep at all. On Thursday I came home from school at 3:45 trying to decide if I would return the next day or run away. I was missing my little guy a lot. He did not nap and fell asleep at 4:15. So I spent my evening very sad (read crying) because all I wanted was to come home and play with him and he slept instead. Very selfish, I know. But then he woke up at 11:30 and was awake until the wee hours. Then I heard myself wishing he would fall asleep. The bulk of my sleep came about 2 hours before the alarm rang at 5:00. It is 10:25 PM right now and my eyes feel like 2 holes burned in rag (my mom says that). I will head to bed after yet another date with my pump and a breathe right nasal strip.

Mother's Day

I had a very enjoyable first Mother's Day! Mike, AJ, and I had McDonald's for breakfast (AJ had his a little later...) and then we went to the mall. AJ was generous enough to buy me a new iPod! I love it and can't wait to fill it up with all my favorite tunes. We went to Anthropolgie and I found shirts on sale, too. Mike wants me to add that he sat on the couch there while I shopped "bored outta my skull".
After naps all around, we played and then played some more. It was nice having my little family around and feeling thankful that I have a little guy who will call me "mama" soon.

18 days

I go back to work on Monday. There about 18 days left of school before summer break and I can be off again. Everyone says it will be good for me. Everyone says I should be excited about doing something "with my mind". I find this statement funny as I think caring for AJ is plenty of work for my mind.
I have mixed feelings about returning. On the postive, I love to teach and I am eager to see my class and see how they have fared without me. I like the end of the year in the fifth grade because there are many fun things to do and projects to work on. I also like preparing them for middle school. I am anxious to see all my co-workers and friends, also.
This paragrpah about the negatives will be much longer. Will AJ wonder where I am and why I left him? Will he take his bottle? Will I be able to provide enough milk while I am working? Will he be mad at me for leaving him? These questions keep me up at night. Then there is the plain fact that I don't want to leave him. I just don't want to go somewhere for 7-8 hours and not take him with me. This has nothing to do with leaving him in the care of others, or whether or not he will eat... I had a baby because I wanted to HAVE A BABY, not leave him and go do something else for the day.
But I must come to grips with going back to work and I better do it quick. And I have to do something about my bad attitude. So until I can work this out for myself, forgive me if I don't want to talk about it, count days left, or discuss how much milk I have pumped. And I am sorry if I sound rude when you ask me, "Isn't it good to be back?" I say, "No." I know it will be good to be back sometime, but not now.

Rainbows

For Kathy & Aldo...



We love you, Friends.

Baby as a Fashion Accessory

I am into babywearing. Very crunchy, I know. But I started wearing him in many kinds of baby "holders" when he was very small. He likes it. I know he likes it because he doesn't cry often when worn, he looks around and soaks up all the scenery, and most of the time he doesn't wiggle and protest when he is in there. I like/support babywearing so much in fact, that I am attending the Babywearing Conference 2008 in June at DePaul University. My friend Jayne and I are going together. I am interested to see just how crunchy other attendees will be. Check out the plan : http://babywearingconference.com/

Here are some photos of AJ in his many "holders". This one is one I bought at a baby fair from http://greenpeadesigns.com/ It is reversible to a brown solid pattern.

This one is a NoJo Sling. I am not as fond of this one even though it is padded because it is very warm. Yes, I am wearing my maternity black velour tracksuit. It was THAT kind of a day...

This one is a fave. I made this one out of a long strip of material I got in the Walmart discount bin. It is a fake Moby Wrap (http://mobywrap.com/t-mobywrap.aspx).

Many people have told me how well behaved AJ is and how happy and easy to care for. He is blessed with good genes of course (ha ha) but I really believe that some of that comes from him being close to me and close to my heart most of the time. Do I put him down? Sure. But both us us prefer to accessorize much of the time. I say I like to wear him, but he does think he is wearing me? :)

Gut Feelings

Why is that I can generally make good decisions and feel relatively confident in my new parenting skills when AJ is quiet, docile, and in an overall good mood? But when he is screaming and crying all my good sense goes right out the window? Let me share an example with you. This evening as Mike was getting ready to give AJ his bedtime bottle, I remembered I needed to give him his medicine. As I prepared the sickly scented strawberry goo in the little squirter, AJ realized he REALLY WANTED HIS BOTTLE NOW! And preceded to cry his cry that breaks my heart and makes me wonder if I am breaking him. I squirted a little of the stuff into the gaping hole. I knew this was a bad idea, yet my flustered innards did it anyway. AJ started gasping and choking and crying not because he wasn't getting fed, but because I was drowning him in fruit flavored pharmaceuticals.
After sitting him up and patting his back, he recovered- none the worse for wear. I, on the other hand, wondered where the little voice in my head had disappeared to. You know the voice that everyone has that reminds them to look both ways, don't touch hot things without a pot holder, and not to attempt to give a teaspoon of amoxycilin to a crying 5 month old. Maybe I just couldn't hear her over the tears. Maybe I wasn't listening.

He's too much...

We visited some friends of ours this afternoon. I work with Kathy and her husband Aldo is pretty cool. He snapped some shots of AJ when he was 3 months old. Aldo is a photo god. Take a look and I am sure you will agree.

My Boy is Back!

I missed my smiler this week. He came back today.